Counseling
During your pregnancy, your social worker will meet with you in person on a regular basis. You can choose the location. She will provide you will all the necessary counseling, as well as provide support during the process. In the beginning, counseling will focus on helping you to make the best decision for you and your child. Let us know if you would like to meet with a mentor- a past birth mother- who can also be there for you throughout the process.

The Birth Father
If at all possible, the birth father should be involved with the counseling. Such counseling may be done as a couple or separately. Birth fathers have the same legal rights as birth mothers, and every attempt to contact him and involve him must be made by the agency.

Picking Adoptive Parents
Once you decide that adoption is the best plan for you and your baby, your social worker will assist you with picking the right adoptive parents. She will be available to talk about the parents you have learned about from their biography albums. She will answer your questions about each family's ability to provide a good home.

You may ask to meet the adoptive parents or request pictures and written updates be sent to you after adoption. Another option is for you to ask that we keep the pictures and the letters at the CT-AFS office until you decide that you are ready to see them. When you are ready, you can call or write to our office and tell us where to mail them to you. To help birth parents form a picture of who our adoptive families are, CT-AFS established guidelines for families seeking an to adopt an infant. They are:

•Married couples or singles are eligible.

•Couples should have been married for at least three (3) years.

•Couples should be unable to have their biological children or only have one child. This restriction does not apply for African-American applicants due to the high need for such adoptive parents in this Connecticut.

•Parents should be between 25 to 47 years old.

•Applicants may reside anywhere in the United States.

•Applicants may be of any race or religion.

•Applicants can be renters or owners of their homes.

After the Baby is Born
It is your choice whether or not you wish to see your child. We will respect your decision. We do, however, encourage you to see and spend some time with your child, as we believe that it will help your healing process after the adoption.

While in the hospital, you can let the hospital staff know if you want a picture of the baby or any mementos, such as the crib card. You can name the baby or ask the adoptive parents to chose a name. After the adoption is completed, the baby's name will be changed to a name chosen by the adoptive parents. Some birth parents and adoptive parents pick out names together.

Just like you can ask for ongoing pictures of the baby, you can also give the adoptive parents pictures of you, or a letter from you. We encourage you to do this, so that the baby can grow up knowing what you look like and understand more about you through your letter.

Another decision you will be making is whether the baby will be placed with the adoptive parents right from the hospital or after a brief period of foster care. In our experience, one to two weeks of foster care can be very beneficial for all involved. It allows birth parents a chance to recuperate from the delivery before they have to sign the adoption papers. Often, birth parents feel like they need just a little extra time after the birth without any pressure to be sure of their adoption plan. Our agency has foster parents that provide care just for infants awaiting adoption. They all have gone through the same home study process as described above and have experience caring for newborns. Both birth parents and adoptive parents may visit and/or call the foster parents.

After You Leave the Hospital
When you and the baby are ready to leave the hospital, your social worker will ask you to sign the necessary paperwork giving the hospital permission to discharge the baby to CT-AFS. Your social worker will bring the baby to a temporary foster family or to the adoptive parents. (See "After the baby is born" above.).

Then, sometime within the next two weeks, you will be asked to sign your application for the termination of your parental rights (TPR). Your social worker will be talking with you periodically after the birth to continue your counseling and help you plan the best time to sign the TPR application. Both birth parents (if available) need to sign this application. At the same time that you sign the TPR application, you will be given the option to sign a Reunion Registry Form. If you fill out and turn in the form, you are signing up for the Reunion Registry. This means that you are giving your consent, in advance, to having contact with the child when she or he becomes eighteen (18) years old.

The application is then sent in to the Probate Court and a hearing is scheduled. If you have signed your consent on the application, then you are not required to appear in court, although you may choose to do so. A representative from CT-AFS will attend the hearing.

After the hearing, the judge sets a period of time for an appeal period. Appeal periods can last from one to four months. When both birth parents sign the termination of parental rights application, then the appeal period is only one month. When there is a missing birth father or another complication, then the appeal period is longer. After the end of the appeal period, the birth parents’ rights are completely terminated.

After the Adoptive Placement
Once the baby is placed with the adoptive parents, the agency is responsible for making sure all goes well. An agency social worker will be making periodic home visits to the family, as well as keeping in touch with them by phone. The baby must be with the adoptive family for at least six months before the adoption may be finalized. If the social worker believes that the adoption is going smoothly and the termination of parental rights has been completed, then the adoptive parents may apply to have the adoption finalized by the Probate Court. Another hearing is scheduled for this purpose; the adoptive parents, child, and social worker attend this hearing. The finalization is the last step in the adoption process. At the hearing, the baby is legally adopted by the adoptive parents.

You will continue to see your CT-AFS Social Worker as needed. You may also be connected to a local counselor if you decide that you need extra support after the adoption.